Hello, my loves. I have a very special guest with me today: my darling friend Dily is here!

Dily is one of the most fearless, determined, proactive human beings in the world. When she learns something new, she doesn’t just let it go in one ear and out the other; she actively implements it.

She is passionate about growth and stretching herself past her comfort zone, and I know for fucking CERTAIN that’s a skill we all need more practice with.

Meet Dily!

Michelle: Tell the people who you are and what you do!

Dily: So, I’m Dily! I am a full-time trader, but I also have a great love for traveling. Very soon I’ll be going on the trip of a lifetime, which is going to be super exciting. I’ll be traveling for eleven months.

That’s what I love: trading, traveling, and self-development.

Connection Isn’t All About Relationships

Michelle: So, Dily actually did the Connected Woman, but unlike most women who do this program, she didn’t come in because of relationship-related stuff.

A lot of people join TCW because their relationships are falling apart, or they’ve only ever had toxic or unhealthy relationships and they don’t know how to have a secure one. That wasn’t a problem for Dily, who’s been with her now-fiance for nearly ten years now. She came into TCW to heal and strengthen her relationship with herself.

Dily, do you mind sharing what led you to TCW?

Dily: Well, as I mentioned, I’m really into self-development. I read a lot of books. I listen a lot of podcasts. But it’s different when you actually join a community and have a mentor you can have a conversation with when you’re struggling.

My relationship with my partner is great. He’s my best friend. He’s the one I want to be with forever. My struggle is actually with the relationship I have with myself, specifically the way that I talk to myself.

Negative Self-Talk is a BITCH

Dily: As I said, I’m a full-time trader, and the way that I talk to myself while trading is especially negative.

I will sometimes make mistakes that I’ve made before, and I will scold myself in my head. I’ll think things like, “If you make a mistake two or three times, you should learn. I’ve made these mistakes two hundred times, and I keep doing the same thing.” But I am learning; these mistakes aren’t even large ones.

With trading, the mistakes I make are quite superficial. But even if I lose the absolute smallest amount of money, my thoughts immediately say, “You failed again. You are a failure. You’re never going to make it. You’ve done this before—when are you going to learn?”

But with the things that I’ve learned from Michelle through The Connected Woman, I’ve been able to pause and ask myself, “Where is this coming from, and why am I doing this to myself?”

As I did this work, childhood memories began to pop up that I had not thought about for years, but it suddenly made sense why I always held myself to such high standards.

I’m from Bulgaria, but I moved to Spain when I was ten. Then I moved to London when I was twenty, lived there for six years, then came to Australia.

Michelle: So you lived in Bulgaria up until the age of ten. Did the culture and how you were raised there impact you in any way?

Dily: A hundred percent. Growing up, there was a lot of struggles, and that’s why we immigrated to Spain.

There a lot of things that are expected from you when you change countries, especially when you are little. Not just from others, but from your parents.

That absolutely influenced the I speak to myself today. “You have to do well. We came to this country because of you. You better go study. You better behave. We came here for you, so you have to be the best. Look at how much we’ve sacrificed.”

Michelle: So then fast forward to now, when you make a little “mistake.” You’re being hard on yourself, and you don’t understand why, but it’s actually that internalized voice telling you you’re not doing enough.

Dily: It was very impactful. But I don’t hold anything against them, because I do understand where they were coming from and the struggles that they had, you know? I know how much they have done for me, and I’m grateful. But I can still see where that impacted the way I talk to myself and try to unlearn that.

The Tonal Shift

Michelle: Having gone through The Connected Woman, how do you speak to yourself now?

Dily: I’m much more aware when those kind of words come into my head. When I’m trading or doing things like this podcast, my mind still says, “Do this well. Do it perfectly. Don’t fuck it up. You have to do it right.”

I have to change it and say, “Wait a second. Why am I saying this?” and snip those negative voices out. I will talk back to the negative voice and say, “You are going to be fine. You can’t fuck this up.”

Michelle: I love it. You’re literally clocking it, owning it, and cleaning it up. You’ve got that voice. You’ve seen it, and now you’re choosing a different path.

Dily’s Story is Far From Done…

This isn’t all Dily and I talked about—there’s a FUCKTON more on the podcast, and she has some truly insane things to share…including the story of how she signed up for scuba-diving classes in an area that had just been hit by a fucking cyclone, which blew my mind.

(Now she’s trying to convince me to go skydiving…yeah, you’re going to have to listen to hear my thoughts on that one.)

Head to Episode 213 of UFYR for more of Dily, and make sure you follow her Instagram (linked below as always) to keep up on her wild travel adventures!

CONNECT WITH DILY:

Follow Dily’s travel adventures on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/travel.and.trades/

WORK WITH MICHELLE: 

These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: https://michellepanning.com/awakening 

Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience

Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman

CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning

Website: http://www.michellepanning.com